Favorite Things

I'm a little hesitant to post this because I'm sure it deserves attribution to whoever wrote it. This came to me in one of those forwards which told me this was the version of The Sound of Music song, Julie Andrews sang in October at Radio City Music Hall on the occasion of her 75th birthday celebration with proceeds going to AARP. He audience was mostly AARP members, of course and the song we all know "A Few of My Favorite Things". Here is it with apologies for non attribution to whoever revised the lyrics.


Maalox and nose drops and needles for knitting,
Walkers and handrails and new dental fittings,
Bundles of magazines tied up in string,
These are a few of my favorite things.

Cadillac's, cataracts, hearing aids and glasses,
Polident, Fixodent and false teeth in glasses,
Pacemakers, golf carts and porches with swings,
These are a few of my favorite things.

When the pipes leak,
When the bones creak,
When the knees go bad
I simply remember my favorite things,
And then I don't feel so bad.

Hot tea and crumpets, and corn pads for bunions,
No spicy hot food or food cooked with onions,
Bathrobes and heat pads and hot meals they bring,
These are a few of my favorite things.

Back pains, confused brains, and no fear of sinnin',
Thin bones and fractures and hair that is thinnin',
And we won't mention our short shrunken frames,
When we remember our favorite things.

When the joints ache,
when the hips break,
When the eyes grow dim,
Then I remember the great life I've had,
And then I don't feel so bad.